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Lucia Greenhouse is the author of the book fathermothergod: My Journey Out of Christian Science. <\/i>The mother of five resides in my hometown of Stonington, Connecticut, and I was privileged to be able to speak with her about her book. In her powerful and compelling narrative of her life in Christian Science, Lucia narrates her childhood, her decision to leave the religion, and the horribly complicated and saddening loss of her mother to cancer, along with much more. It was a book that was almost impossible to put down, and outlines the complexities of religion, family, and individual strength.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n What has been the most meaningful part about sharing your story?<\/p>\n Most gratifying for me was how the timing of fathermothergod<\/i>\u2019s publication in 2011 coincided with the advent of social media. Suddenly there was a way for others to share their own experiences-many far more hellish than mine-and help each other recover from trauma. (We former Christian Scientists as a demographic are \u2013almost by definition\u2014extremely na\u00efve about medicine and mental health, and very fearful. And, not surprisingly, many of us get diagnosed with PTSD.) Had I published fathermothergod <\/i>even five years earlier, these online communities would certainly have formed, but being part of others\u2019 journeys to recovery has been very rewarding.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Many of the events you wrote about were extremely traumatic. Was there a silver lining in being able to articulate these events in your own words?<\/p>\n Yes and no. Before that silver lining, so to speak, there was a lot of post traumatic revisiting to go through.\u00a0<\/span>And that was very difficult.\u00a0<\/span>At one point towards the end of writing the final draft, I holed up in a house on my own (Stonington!) and worked around the clock, taking short breaks to sleep and eat.\u00a0<\/span>There\u2019s a term called \u201cflooding\u201d in PTSD, where one re-experiences trauma.\u00a0<\/span>It\u2019s also actually a form of therapy in which the patient becomes desensitized by repeatedly revisiting a traumatic experience.\u00a0<\/span>Anyway, there was some of that to contend with. The effect was to make the memories less painful, but revisiting the events of that year, 1986, prompted a flooding response.\u00a0<\/span>But in order to articulate my experience, I had to re-feel it.<\/p>\n Was the feedback you received from publishing your story what you expected? Was it better or worse?<\/p>\n The feedback was in general very positive.\u00a0<\/span>From people raised in Christian Science who left the religion, or were in the process of leaving, the response was overwhelmingly positive.\u00a0<\/span>I also got feedback from people raised in other controlling religions and belief systems \u2014 ranging from Hasidic Jews in Brooklyn to Scientologists to Christian fundamentalists and Mormons.\u00a0<\/span>By contrast, the response from current Christian Scientists was sometimes very nasty. The Christian Science Church itself is very savvy in matters of publicity. They wisely ignored fathermothergod<\/i> entirely.\u00a0<\/span>(Which is too bad because I suppose a response might have boosted sales!)\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n I know it was difficult to let your extended family know you were publishing this story, but was there anything else particularly difficult about the writing\/publishing process for you?<\/p>\n Let\u2019s see.\u00a0<\/span>I didn\u2019t really like the self-promotional aspect of publishing.\u00a0<\/span>An author is expected now more than ever to really work social media and that just never felt good! Aside from that, the reality of publishing was far less scary than anticipating it. There is one small exception to that, and something that I hadn\u2019t really considered.\u00a0<\/span>The book did relatively well with regards to sales, but in my hometown a lot of people read it. The local bookstore, the local library, were both extremely supportive in promoting it, etc. The net effect of that, was a little weird in one respect.\u00a0 <\/span>Because fathermothergod <\/i>is a memoir, over time I realized that a lot of people in my hometown knew some deeply personal things about me (or, at least about the first half of my life) while I knew virtually nothing about them unless they were friends, so there became and exists, even now, a weird lopsidedness sometimes to seeing or meeting people (just in my town.) Sometimes that lopsidedness is nothing more than a little bit of paranoia.\u00a0<\/span>I\u2019m not sure if I\u2019m articulating this well.\u00a0<\/span>Maybe the best way to put it is, sometimes I do Skype sessions with book groups, and if those groups are in Omaha or Boise or where ever, I am totally comfortable being completely candid.\u00a0 <\/span>But if I\u2019m meeting with a local book group, I feel a little, I don’t know\u2014squirmy?<\/p>\n How do you think Christian Science has affected your worldview today? Are there parts you\u2019re still appreciative of?<\/p>\n Hmmm.\u00a0<\/span>I\u2019m having to think about this question still, but I know you have a deadline!\u00a0<\/span>I would say\u2014I have always loved singing in churches.\u00a0<\/span>And there is something about Christian Science that is very optimistic (when it isn\u2019t a distortion of reality.)\u00a0<\/span>I think in part because of Christian Science, I never felt limited by anything like measures of IQ or potential because I was taught from very early on that there were no limits to what I could accomplish.\u00a0<\/span>That probably served me well on some level. (I\u2019m not sure this is strictly attributable to Christian Science.)<\/p>\n But I\u2019m answering these questions within the bubble of Covid-19.\u00a0<\/span>Again, I don’t know if this is because of Christian Science, or because of being raised in any religion, and then rejecting it, but I do find that I am feeling more spiritual now than ever before. I find myself praying (but not in a C.S. way).\u00a0<\/span>Every night I pray for my immediate and extended family, our healthcare workers, our grocery store workers, the UPS guys, and people who are sick.\u00a0<\/span>We are now saying grace before dinner every night\u2014something we haven\u2019t done in years but maybe that\u2019s not so much a legacy of Christian Science as it is where we all are right now. Oddly, though, in the first few weeks of this sheltering-in-place era, certain unwelcome Christian Science phrases were flooding my thinking again\u2014in that PTSD sort of way.\u00a0<\/span>For example, I hadn\u2019t thought about the Scientific Statement of Being<\/i> for decades and it just returned with a vengeance\u2014couldn\u2019t get it out of my head, which was weird. Just over and over and over, \u201cthere is no life, truth intelligence or substance in matter\u2026.\u201d<\/i>\u00a0<\/span>(Just to jog your memory, the Scientific Statement of Being<\/i> is a mantra of sorts, kind of like the Christian Science version of the Holy Rosary.\u00a0 \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Did leaving Christian Science affect you in a way that you did not foresee?<\/p>\n Not really.<\/p>\n Is there anything you wish you had included in your book looking back on it that you would want your readers to know?<\/p>\n Having gotten feedback from readers, I think my relationship with my sister, and her relationship with the Christian Science church, probably wasn\u2019t made clear enough.\u00a0<\/span>Some readers understood (incorrectly) that Olivia remained a Christian Scientist, which she did not.\u00a0<\/span>I felt that in writing my story I wanted to shield my sister, and others, from scrutiny, so maybe I erred by not writing with enough clarity and precision in this.<\/p>\n Also, there was one thing my mother\u2019s brother (my uncle Jack) was very upset about, and that is, that I did not mention in fathermothergod<\/i> that there was no autopsy.\u00a0<\/span>I remember feeling badly about this, but also confused by it. In discussing this with my mother\u2019s two sisters (Aunt Kay and Aunt Mary) they believed that he was very very angry about his sister\u2019s illness and death and Christian Science as a whole, and focused that anger on the lack of an autopsy.\u00a0<\/span>Both aunts reminded me, probably to assuage my worry on this, that there had been two surgeries within a month, as well as hundreds of pages of doctors and nurses evaluations, lab results, etc, and so there really were no surprises as to what had happened to my mother. \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Vice versa, is there anything you wish you had excluded?<\/p>\n Lol \u2014 sometimes I wish, for parenting reasons, that I had left out any references to having smoked pot with my brother. But it was germane to the story\u2026. my editor felt it had to be left in, and I think she was probably right.<\/p>\n For other people who are timid to share their personal story, do you have any advice?<\/p>\n I am all for people coming to terms with their stories, their families\u2019 stories, and if they have a story to tell, there are probably people who will benefit from hearing it.\u00a0 <\/span>If you can wait until some people are no longer among the living, it can be easier\u2026.<\/p>\n Would you ever want your book to be made into a movie? If so, who would you want to play some of the roles?<\/p>\n So funny you should ask that! I have not wanted fathermothergod <\/i>to be made into a movie.\u00a0<\/span>I was approached around the pub date, but I never really considered it for two reasons. One, in book form, I retain total control over content and portrayal (aside from editor\u2019s suggestions which didn\u2019t compromise my telling.) I would have to relinquish that control upon selling the movie rights.\u00a0 <\/span>Two, I didn\u2019t think it would be fair to my extended family.\u00a0 <\/span>It is one thing to be depicted in a book (someone has to go to the trouble of reading it!) it is another thing entirely to be depicted in film. To some extent the exposure forces one to relive the whole thing, and I didn\u2019t want to do that to certain members of my family.\u00a0 <\/span>Recently, my daughter has been working on a screenplay of fathermothergod<\/i> with the understanding that I reserve the right to give input,\u00a0 <\/span>and also reserve the right to not have her shop it if I\u2019m not ok with it.\u00a0 <\/span>(Kind of turns the whole exercise into a fool\u2019s errand for her but she has been very accommodating, and I haven\u2019t read any of it yet!)<\/p>\n On the topic of fantasy cast, for a while Ellie and I would discuss it just for fun, but the picks have changed over the years as the story gets older, as do the actors!) \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Your book for me not only represented an extremely difficult religious situation, but also showed how you and your siblings were forced to face extreme situations at a young age. Is there any advice you have for other young people who are living through difficult times that are out of their control?<\/p>\n I am a firm believer in therapy. I could add to this, but it might sound preachy to someone reading this, so I\u2019ll leave it at that!\u00a0<\/span>Well, one more thing.\u00a0<\/span>Trying to live a life of moderation is pretty key, too.\u00a0<\/span>Without it, it is hard to make any strides toward recovery from a traumatic experience; it just gets buried. Ok, two more things – finding a creative outlet can be really helpful.\u00a0<\/span>And\u2026 walking is a great\u00a0 <\/span>meditative practice.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Lucia Greenhouse is the author of the book fathermothergod: My Journey Out of Christian Science. The mother of five resides in my hometown of Stonington, Connecticut, and I was privileged to be able to speak with her about her book. In her powerful and compelling narrative of her life in Christian Science, Lucia narrates her Read More …<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":354,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5,6],"tags":[243,242,79,241,179,199],"class_list":["post-1225","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-features","category-interviews-profiles","tag-christianscience","tag-fathermothergod","tag-interview","tag-luciagreenhouse","tag-memoir","tag-nonfiction"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/courses.lsa.umich.edu\/english-344-001\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1225","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/courses.lsa.umich.edu\/english-344-001\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/courses.lsa.umich.edu\/english-344-001\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/courses.lsa.umich.edu\/english-344-001\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/354"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/courses.lsa.umich.edu\/english-344-001\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1225"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/courses.lsa.umich.edu\/english-344-001\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1225\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1229,"href":"https:\/\/courses.lsa.umich.edu\/english-344-001\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1225\/revisions\/1229"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/courses.lsa.umich.edu\/english-344-001\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1225"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/courses.lsa.umich.edu\/english-344-001\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1225"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/courses.lsa.umich.edu\/english-344-001\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1225"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}